IN  JAP^AN	243
some day receive a title. On the other hand the slow advance in
the Restaurant ; step by step ; the dull routine, breakfast,
lunch, dinner ; dinner, breakfast, lunch, day after day and year
after year.
I gave him good advice. I pointed out the futility and evil of
a diplomatic career, its uselessness, its deadening effects upon the
intellect—the inevitable regrets for a misspent life and possibly
no time for a deathbed repentance. The life of a man mistrusted,
disliked and almost certainly a pompous bore, more occupied
about his seat at table than about his immortal soul, if he had one.
On the other hand the pleasant atmosphere of the Restaurant
and the cheerful, if at times mixed, society, the satisfaction of
serving nice food nicely to nice people—the utility and the charm
—and the tips—of a waiter's career—& wife and children at
home and no forced separation—and now and again perhaps a
little pleasant undiscovered adventure in the hotel, or out of it—
who knows—and one day promotion to Head Waiter and dignity
and respect. What Ambassador ever had a more useful career,
or a more honourable one ? It was a thousand times better to
serve food than to make wars. And then at last the Management
and the frock coat with honour and clear conscience and a
banking account—respect, affection, esteem. There could be
no hesitation* No really good man would deliberately sell his
self-respect for a gold embroidered tunic or his honour for a
cocked hat, for neither a tunic nor a cocked hat can open the
hearts of your fellow men or the doors of heaven. He decided
to remain on as a waiter and I congratulated him on his decision,
At a hotel in which I stayed in one of the provincial towns of
Japan I found myself confronted with a problem that after
considerable mental effort I entirely failed to solve and I had to
call in the aid of the innkeeper.
There were three electric lights suspended from the ceiling of
my bedroom. On my return late from the cinema I said good-
night to my interpreter who went off to his room at the farther
end of the long and straggling building. The three lights were
burning. Ready to get into bed I turned off the first switch
and the light went out. The second effort was equally successful
but when I switched off the third light I met with a surprise.
The lamp it is true was extinguished but the other two were
simultaneously relit. I tried them in different rotation but no
matter what combination I adopted the result was the same.
Always the first two lights went out only to reappear in all their